Fear, Doubt and Doing it Anyway
I thought if I was self-compassionate I wouldn’t be successful.
It's a common belief to think the tough internal critic was driving me towards success.
When I did achieve a little success I thought that it was my internal critic who made it happen.
But ultimately this harsh and judgmental voice would regularly kill my mojo and I found it hard to stick with things because it zapped my motivation and self confidence. It isn't the critic that makes us succeed - it's our skills and efforts.
We can only take so much harsh inner criticism before we use numbing strategies (food and alcohol), distraction (social media) and emotional avoidance as a coping strategy when we're under pressure. Work becomes a struggle. We spend so much time worrying about things. Or we drop out of trying all together because that way we can’t really fail.
Self-compassion is an ally. It supports us as we walk towards our goals on our journey.
The voice that’s always criticising is responsible for it taking longer to get to where we want to go... if we get there at all.
The fear of failure and rejection has stopped so many people trying something new, including leaving unsatisfying and unrewarding situations.
Self-compassion gives us permission to make a mistake and put our authentic selves “out there” when we know deep within we have something beautiful to offer to the world.
Now, with a reservoir of self compassion, if something I try doesn’t work out, I can keep going on the path I’m on - even if I have doubts and fears.
We can’t overcome or overpower our doubts and fears. We can only find a wiser way to relate to them so they don’t imprison us from doing all the things we dream about 💜